Kohl's Beauty Box Review

Whoever said complaining didn't get you anything needs to shut up.

I was bummed about Allure's summer beauty box going on sale during a final exam, even though I was on the fence about ordering it anyway. I tweeted my frustration and this happened:

...you have my attention.

I DM'd them and they asked for my address and told me they were sending me a beauty box. UM HECK YES. It arrived on May 19th - not bad for something I didn't pay for at all.

I do think it's a bit strange to call it a box, considering it came in an adorable bag.

Strange nomenclature aside, I'm thrilled it came in a bag. Do I have more makeup bags than I know what to do with? Yes. Do I love the pants off of this black polka dot one anyway? Still yes.

HELLO. 

Here's what was inside. Full-size products are indicated with (FS) behind their value.

Hydroxatone AM/PM Anti-Wrinkle Complex, 0.3 oz, approx. value $20.70
Um, wow. A full-size of this wrinkle cream costs $69. Yowza. (Sadly, I know this is not unusual.) I'm at the point in my life where I know I need to start preventative skin care, but am half too lazy/cheap to and half protesting the societal ideals that require women to be terrified of wrinkles but not men. Erm. Anyway, once I see my first wrinkle I'll probably cry and start using this, so I'm saving it.

Sugar Sweet Cheeks Cheek Stick in Rosy Posy, 0.15 oz, approx. value $10 (FS)
I did not think I'd be on the blush stick train, but Tarte's cheekstain changed my mind. This is a good bit smaller. It's also pigmented as fuck.

L: one swipe (!), R: blended out

For darker-skinned folk, pigmentation on blushes can be a good thing. For me, it's definitely a curse. I'm hesitant to use this just because it is so bold, and I'm not sure that the color flatters me. If I do use it it won't be like Tarte's where I swipe it on my cheeks, blend it with a blush brush, and go - with this, I'd use a brush to pick up a little bit at a time and caaarefully blend it out. I'm not sure I want to spend that much time on blush!

Mariah Carey Dreams Perfume, .05 fl oz, approx. value $1.17
I'm not big on perfume; I prefer more masculine scents these days. However, as far as perfumes go, this one is okay. It reminds me of Vera Wang's Princess, which I wore religiously throughout middle school. Not my cup of tea, but a nice fragrance.

Essie Nail Polish in Mojito Madness, .46 fl oz, approx. value $8.50 (FS)
UM, I LOVE ESSIE. And I've wanted this color for over a year. I let out a small squeal when I saw this item. Unfortunately I just started a job where I am only allowed to wear neutral colors of nail polish & some pinks. I did a quick coat, though, to see what it looked like:

It looks a bit more olive-y in the picture than it is in real life, but that's pretty accurate. Yes, I just went to my window. I've already gone outside once today, what more do you want from me? 

Purminerals Chateau de Vine Lipstick, .0003 oz, approx. value ??
I didn't bother calculating the value on these. Too many zeroes. The samples are so strange:

WHY. How am I supposed to get an accurate idea of your product, especially texture? Also, I'm not 12. Lipstick samples packaged as lip prints does not appeal to me in any way.

And then I flipped it over.

NO. My entire body recoiled looking at this. That is an awful way to apply lipstick, unless your lips are like... the exact same shape as the card and you can line it up perfectly. I still have every brush from my OCC lip tars, a RT lip brush, and a Jane Iredale. This is not a way I want to put on lipstick. Back to the drawing board, Purminerals. No.

(Also, as a wine girl, I wish the names were more wine-y for a vineyard collection.)

Eylure Naturalites False Lashes, approx. value $5.99 (FS)
I've recently gotten really into false lashes, so this was actually great timing. I like these. They're not my favorite and not quite natural, but definitely not dramatic and un-intimidating for newbies.

Jane Cream Eyeshadow in Brilliant Bronze, .14 oz, approx. value $8.00 (FS)
I was a bit sad to see this, since I don't use cream shadow much and thought I had a similar color. However, the poor lighting I opened this in was to blame! I was thrilled to see once I swatched it that this is a metallic gold, unlike the brown 'tini shadow I possess.

'tini on left, Jane on right

I don't really think of these as creams; more like... liquids? Mousse? I mean, they're nothing like Bobbi Brown cream shadows or Maybelline Color Tattoos. Still, now that I have two in the same color family, I might play around with a dark-ish neutral look using these.

Lorac Cobra Mascara, .14 oz, approx. value $11.23
Hm. This isn't available on Kohl's website, which is... an interesting marketing choice. If I liked this deluxe sample, I would have to buy it from a competitor. I would still, theoretically, now know about Lorac products, so perhaps that's what they're going for? This is an okay mascara. I'd rate it about a 6. Average volume and length, a few fewer clumps than I generally expect.

Elle Lip Gloss in 07, .17 oz, approx. value $16.00
I'm not a big lip gloss person. I find them sticky and with my hair, I spend half my day pulling strands of hair out of my lips. I tried this on and it's not my bag. The color isn't bad, though it's a bit browner than I tend to like. Its big no, though, is the rainbow glitter that makes me feel like I'm 12 again. It's also thicker than other lip glosses. While it may be an advantage to some people, it has me mashing my lips together and feeling like at some point they might stick. So, no thanks for me. Sorry there's no swatch but the pictures didn't turn out and I'm unwilling to put it on again, even for science.

Be Delectable Hand Cream in Coconut & Cream, 2 fl. oz, approx. value $5.50
I fucking love coconut. This hand cream is no exception; it smells delicious. It goes on a tad bit greasy but dries quickly and doesn't leave any icky trace behind, so I'm okay with it. This may be my new go-to lotion that I keep in my purse.

theBalm How 'Bout Them Apples? in Pie, 0.7 oz, approx. value $5.33
OMG. I was heartbroken not to get this item in my Birchbox, so I'm thrilled I get to try it now! I wouldn't use these on my lips (I don't like the texture), but I'm all about trying out blushes lately. For such a tiny sample (dime-size), the packet is very well-constructed - I'm pretty sure there's even a magnet in there to keep it closed. Go theBalm. I was almost scared to swatch this, lest it not live up to my expectations; fortunately, it definitely did.

L: one swipe, R: blended. Ignore random swatches to the right.

First of all, the formula is awesome - super easy to pick up color. The camera isn't doing this one justice, possibly because it is a perfect blush for me; it blends easily and quickly into something that doesn't make me look like a clown. I have a feeling I'm going to go through this pretty quickly, and will probably end up buying the full palette, which I've been wanting to do for months anyway.

In conclusion: wow. Go Kohl's. I received over $90 worth of product, and quite a few will get used! Now, the million-dollar question: will Kohl's be my new go-to for my beauty needs? I'm certainly impressed with their brands - I never knew they carried such awesome beauty products! - but they will probably not replace Sephora and Ulta, simply because they do not have a reward program. However, if there was a coupon at Kohl's or a product I needed right now unavailable at Sephora or Ulta, I would definitely go to Kohl's.

Comet Vomit - Swatches & Review

Comet Vomit is one of the little-known indie stores; I only found out about it through its owner, whom I got to know on a subreddit last summer. /u/marsandtherealgirl did primarily nail polishes, and I won one in a giveaway last summer that I get compliments on ALL THE TIME. She announced a few weeks ago she was expanding her shop, and with a little disposable income after graduation, I decided to try some of her new products!

Most of Comet Vomit's nail polishes cost $10 for .5 oz. .5 oz is a standard size for nail polish; OPI, Essie, etc. all do that size of a bottle. Comet Vomit is thus a little bit more expensive than that. Her mini nail polishes are $4 for 1/3 of that, or about .16 oz. Eyeshadows are $5 apiece. Lip balms are $1 for a mini tub and $3 for a tube. On to what I got!

Big Balm Theory Flavored Lip Balm in Cherry
I opted for a tub rather than a tube, though both are cheap! I like the lip balm a lot. To me it's not quite maraschino cherry as she describes but darker, almost like a dark chocolate cherry. It smells amazing! The first time it went on very smooth. It was  little harder the second time. I'm 99% sure I closed it tightly, but it may have been user error. It's still easy to put on, just requires a little bit more rubbing to get some on my finger. I will be purchasing a full size of this at some point.

Behold my awful nails.

Nail Polish in Terek Noir
Again, I went for the mini, as is my tendency. Terek Noir is a matte black with silver sparkle - I don't know if you can have matte sparkle, but, there ya go. It took three thin coats to get to the desired opacity for me, which isn't bad. I like the formula and it dries REALLY quickly, which is always a plus! However, I'm not sure I'm in love with it. We'll see.

Eyeshadow in Light Years and Some Kind of God
These were the two shades I wanted to try most off of the website - I like the names & I like the colors. Of the two, I definitely like "Some Kind of God" more; it's right up my alley. Both shades were easy to work with and had a good formula.

Awful swatching oh god

Overal - I like Comet Vomit. I'm glad I have Some Kind of God, but I think I'll probably stick to lip balms and nail polishes for a bit. There are definitely a few of those I have my eye on! 

Project Swatch: Reds and Pinks

I've decided to swatch my entire indie collection. I made a spreadsheet of my collection, complete with 'color family'. After much deliberation, I decided to use the description from websites vs. my own perception of colors. I hope to swatch everything over the next week. Of course I have a haul from DG coming Monday which will possibly render some of my swatches obsolete, but oh well!

The following are swatches from Shiro, Notoriously Morbid, My Beauty Addiction, and Glamour Doll Eyes.

First up are the reds and pinks in my collection.

Shiro Unforgettable is a "hot pink-toned shimmery red with magenta sparks". On me, it reads a little bit more brown than the description.

Glamour Doll Eyes Fire Breather is a "vibrant red with orange undertones and gold shimmer". It's a little less "red" than I think of as red and more copper.

Notoriously Morbid Boca del Inferno is "a rich, deep oxblood". That seems about right! My first thought was "brick". NOTE: This shade was not swatched over Pixie Epoxy, as mattes don't play nice with most sticky bases!

My Beauty Addiction Aruba is "a light warm coral/pink with a HIGH shimmer". I totally disagree on this one; I categorized it as a neutral before I saw the description, and I wouldn't call it pink after the swatch. It could potentially be called a peach, but that's being generous. It looks like a light golden brown or taupe on me.

Shiro Wildflowers is a "soft petal pink with green and gold sparks". This shade is STUNNING, and definitely true to the description.

Shiro Destiny's Princess is a "shimmery, bright bubblegum pink with gold undertones". True to the description, IMO.

Glamour Doll Eyes Cajun is a "medium to bright pink with orange and gold sparkle and sheen". On me, it looks somewhere between a pink and a purple.

My favorites out of these are definitely Unforgettable, Fire Breather, Wildflowers, and Destiny's Princess. The first are great for a mostly neutral eye look! I can't wait to use Wildflowers as a highlight. Destiny's Princess is one that I don't quite yet know how to use, but it's BEAUTIFUL - and named after Zelda!

Ipsy - May 2014

Ipsy usually has pretty all-around decent customer satisfaction. Some people love it, some people hate it. This month is unique in that almost everyone hates this month's bag. It's especially interesting because the sneak peeks were promising and then... fail.

The theme, "Fresh Picks", is nice enough. Unfortunately, for some reason, they decided to do a skincare/haircare based bag. This didn't work for them in January... I'm not quite sure why they thought it would be better received now. Yes, sunscreen is a good idea - especially with the self-tan products they've sent out in the past. Other than that, though, this theme could have used a little more thinking through.

At least the bag's cute?

Here's what I got:

Pacifica Mineral Eye Shadow Duo, .07 oz, approx. value ???

Thoroughly mediocre. Decent colors; pigmentation is much better on the champagne color than on the purple. I will probably use the second color only. Weirdly, this isn't listed on Pacifica's website. I'm not sure why they'd send out a new product if subscribers can't repurchase it/buy for friends/etc.

Hang Ten Sunscreen, 1 fl. oz, approx. value $2.16

I mean, it's sunscreen. I'll use it. Meh.

Avene Thermal Spring Water, 1.76 oz, approx. value $3

...I have no idea what this product is supposed to do.

I even went to their website, and apparently, these are some applications for this product:

...I still have no idea why I would use this. Fortunately, someone is willing to swap me something I'll actually use for it. Hallelujah.

Nailtini Nail Lacquer in Frappe, .5 fl. oz, approx. value $13

I don't own a Nailtini polish, but I've heard good things. Unfortunately, I will never use this color. Ever. Hoping to swap this one for something more vibrant. This would be good for someone who doesn't have a lot of polish - a sheer pink/French mani color is great - but I have over 100 polishes, and if I wanted this color, I'd have acquired it by now.

Pur-lisse Pur-moist Moisturizer, .5 oz, approx. value $16

Having just calculated the value, I can only assume this moisturizer is made of unicorn jizz. I'm very happy with my drugstore moisturizer, though, so this is going into the swap pile.

Epic fail - there are exactly 1.5 products I'll use in this bag. A value of over $34 doesn't change that. The bag itself is super cute, though I wish it didn't have "ipsy" written all over it.

If you want to join me in seeing if Ipsy gets better, you're welcome to use my referral link here.

I'd like to close by quoting my April Ipsy review last month: "This probably means next month will be worse than January's skincare/haircare bag, but honestly, it'll be worth it."

Sometimes I hate being right.

Shiro Cosmetics - Review and Swatches

If I think about the big names in indie cosmetics, Shiro and Fyrinnae are the two that spring to mind. Shiro was actually my first indie purchase, back in August. This was before I knew what I was doing with indies and didn't have any sort of sticky base, so things didn't go well. I've rediscovered Shiro and WOW, am I glad I did!

Caitlin, the owner, bases her collections around various nerdy themes. There's a Zelda collection, a Minecraft collection, a Pokemon collection... She's mastered the art of creative names while still avoiding copyright infringement. While the eyeshadows are the star of her show, she also sells lip balms, face products, and glosses. Caitlin also recently acquired products from Detrivore, whose customer service issues threatened her business.

Shiro has multiple sizes of shadows: samples (1/8 tsp in plastic baggies for $1), minis (1g in jar for $3.50), full sizes (2g in jar for $6), and in some cases, collector's editions (2 grams in special jar for $8.50). Lip balms are $5 for .15 oz. Glosses have sample sizes starting at $2. The most expensive options are custom glosses, where you get to choose any lip-safe color or have Caitlin do a custom color just for you! They start at $9, but adding opacity or "flavoring" cost $1 a piece. Shiro also has face products, but I haven't used any, so I don't feel qualified to talk about them other than the fact that they exist and start at $1.50. Overall, I find that Shiro gives some of the best bang for your buck.

Onward! Recently, Shiro had an anniversary sale with 15% off. I took advantage and got a few eyeshadows as well as a custom gloss. Caitlin includes candy with each order (I ate the smarties before I could take a picture!) as well as a note. I placed my order on April 30th. At that point, Caitlin had upped the estimated turnaround time from two to four weeks. (She even apologized on Facebook to those whose order may not make it in the promised two weeks.)  It was shipped out on May 11th, and I received it on May 14th. Here's my loot:

I bought five minis and a custom gloss. The sixth jar is The Fourth Be With You, a full-size gift for anyone who placed an order $15 or more. The two samples are extras Caitlin throws in with every order. I was thrilled to get Maiden Queen from the Seven Kingdoms collection (if you have to guess what this is based off of, you clearly don't know me) and a Detrivore sample. 

All of the shadows come with a sifter, which some people like and some don't. I'm ambivalent. On to swatches:

All swatches are over Fyrinnae's Pixie Epoxy

Custom gloss in Steve

I'm thrilled with all of my choices. Additionally, all of Shiro's swatches on the site seem to be pretty close to real life. I don't know if The Fourth Be With You will get any use, but hey, it was free. I'll probably see if anyone on the indie subreddit wants it. As for my custom gloss - it's incredible! Caitlin recently added the option to add flavoring and I'm glad she did; I have a gloss in Women's Weapons that smells like tires. I chose "champagne" as the flavor, and it smells sweet and inoffensive enough.

I feel I also have to mention Shiro's stunning customer service. I had initially ordered the Honey flavor and then read some things that changed my mind; Caitlin was happy to change it for me. Additionally, I want to place pictures on top of the jars to make them more uniform. It's easy to find individual designs for the Legends collection, but I needed the mockingjay pin/pokeball for those collections and couldn't find it. Caitlin sent me the image files from her website twenty minutes after I'd asked if there was any way I could get them. Seriously, she's amazing.

Look: there's a reason Shiro just celebrated its fourth anniversary. Their products are great, the price is right, and customer service is amazing. I would highly recommend Shiro for anyone's first foray into the world of indie cosmetics. 

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Birchbox - May 2014

Birchbox is the subscription I am consistently on the fence about. I have been disappointed by boxes, but I have yet to be "wow"ed by a box. There are three factors that keep me subscribed:

• The hope the box will get better
• It's cheap ($10/month)
• The rewards

Birchbox allows you to review each item in their box for 10 points. 100 points are redeemable for $10 off anything in the Birchbox shop. With 4-6 items a month to review, this adds up quick. Additionally, any dollar you spend in the Birchbox shop gets you a point. After discovering the product in my January box, I just ordered a full-size Beauty Protector Protect and Detangle (IT SMELLS SO GOOOOD) for a whopping $1.95. That being said, I've spent $60 on Birchboxes so far. Is it worth it? This month, no, but the rewards soften the blow!

Here's what I received in my box:

Gilchrist & Soames Spa Therapy Body Lotion, 1.35 fl. oz, approx. value $2.52

I am so unimpressed with this lotion, which is disappointing because it's FINALLY a decent sized sample. It smells like any lotion you might find in a hotel room. Additionally, it's more slippery than other lotions - like, it doesn't feel like it soaks into my skin. I've used it once and that's enough. It's going up for swap.

Number 4 Volumizing Shampoo, 1 fl. oz, approx. value $4

This stuff smells amazing! As for whether or not it gives me volume.... eh. The jury's out. I would also never in a million years pay $34 for shampoo. That's ridiculous. 

Number 4 Volumizing Conditioner, .25 fl. oz, approx. value $1

This was a "bonus", and as such is a foil packet rather than a bottle. The sample is bigger than some, but I have so much freaking hair that this was still barely enough for one conservative use. Liked the smell and texture; still not paying $34 for something I only used once and saw no life-changing difference. If I'm going to buy hair products that expensive, I'd better come out of the shower looking like a supermodel. Also, this teeny-tiny sample was worth AN ENTIRE DOLLAR. That says more, to me, than the price of the full-size product. 

SmartyPants Gummy Vitamins, 2, approx. value: $0.33

In what world am I going to take six vitamins a day, especially when said vitamins don't provide iron? Answer: no world. Ever. Also, this packet has two gummies. Yeah. They didn't even bother sending a "full" sample. C'MON, Y'ALL.

Marcelle BB Cream, .28 oz, approx. value $4.73

Yeah, I'm gonna level with you: I didn't even try this product. BB creams don't do shit for me, and I'd rather keep this teeny sample intact so I can swap it for something I might at least try or throw it in as a freebie when I do a swap. 

Cynthia Rowley Eyeliner in Silver, .03 oz, approx. value $12

I didn't have high hopes for this eyeliner, but then I swatched it.

ONE swipe. ONE. 

OH MY GOD. A beautiful, brilliant, metallic silver, this product is everything I never knew I needed.

In short, this month kind of sucked, despite a value of nearly $25 for all of the products I received. But hey, at least the points system is great! Take note, Ipsy. If you are suddenly desperate to get a Birchbox, I'll get 50 points if you use my link here.